Prepare my own paints

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Hudley The Jester 2006

“I have a different idea of elegance. I don’t dress like a fop, it’s true, but my moral grooming is impeccable. I never appear in public with a soiled conscience, a tarnished honor, threadbare scruples, or an insult that I haven’t washed away. I’m always immaculately clean, adorned with independence and frankness. I may not cut a stylish figure, but I hold my soul erect. I wear my deeds as ribbons, my wit is sharper than the finest mustache, and when I walk among men, I make truths ring like spurs.”

― Edmond Rostand, Cyrano de Bergerac  


Years ago, when I read Cyrano de Bergerac, I have attended to his words with passion. It makes it hard for me to dress. But I dress in a comfortable honest fashion. Since I was a child, I have always loved boots, hats, and jackets.

Always containing and holding the passion of my soul within them. Until I read Rostand’s book, I never knew that there was someone else that saw fashion as I do.   Words too are a type of clothing for me with the same regards as “I hold my soul erect.”

The creative process as well. Ideas and passions are “deeds as ribbons.” I tend to make a mockery of what is cool or fashionably beautiful. “Threadbare scruples, or an insult that I haven’t washed away.”  

Green or black tennis shoes, straight leg pants and t-shirts and my Jester outfits hanging in my closet are my “different idea of elegance.” Inside me are goals that do not aspire to the latest fashions but instead inspire to the sensations of my mind, heart, and soul.  

I have been thinking about William Blake a lot lately. If I could address the inspiration of his “thought body” and “creative soul,” I would dress like him because this is what pulls me. The perfection of his creative dress. I ponder on this and think about how it might be possible to dress to that place of his soul? To be covered by such a sensational creative sense of fashion?  

“Blake was not just the author. He also illustrated it, engraved the entire text and the pictures by hand on copper plates, printed it, and hand-colored every copy so that no two were alike. He had even developed the process by which his books were produced and had prepared his own paints.” *  

Sad to say here I do dress like a “Fop.”

Yet I am trying to better myself. You see Blake and Bergerac inspire me to make my “truths ring like spurs.”  Did I get that right…??  

*Enjoying “The Book of Thel” by William Blake Ed Friedlander, M.D. http://www.pathguy.com/thel.htm

old song that still seems fresh and new??? How can this be??

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