Being Unladylike

Punk Rock Historian and Profession Consultant

Hudley Flipside


We have not yet learned to value the creativity, courage, and competence required to negotiate the ordinary but devastating frustrations and crises of human experience.

Jacobs, Ruth H. Be an Outrageous Older Woman Harper Collins. Kindle Edition.

“Alone with just a little bit of soul, right now, now, baby
Darling, everything is gonna be alright
One more time, just one more time, baby…”


What strange times we are living in. The contrary nature of life is overwhelming. Nature seems a bit outrageous and shrilling.

Just last week youngest son was meant to go on his first Geophysics lab above Ojai, California. The coastal regions to studying the mighty earth and her movements.

Then he went to one party with ten friends. The only time in a long while where he felt safe. Then right before the event he got the Covid19 tracer call. He did not get to go to his well planned out lab. That was last Monday. Most likely the worst day of his life. The family all tested negative. We were lucky. Yet I was mad as hell.

The opportunity will come again because that is his major.

Security is a good need, I think. I did not always feel this way.

Today while watching some news about the floods in Kentucky a commercial came on. I don’t know what was being sold but the song caught my attention. It was the song Security.

Otis Ray Redding Jr. (September 9, 1941 – December 10, 1967) was an American singer and songwriter. He is considered one of the greatest singers in the history of American popular music and a seminal artist in soul music and rhythm and blues. Nicknamed the “King of Soul”, Redding’s style of singing gained inspiration from the gospel music that preceded the genre. His singing style influenced many other soul artists of the 1960s. Label:          Volt – 45-117, Vinyl, 7″, 45 RPM, Single, Promo 1964.


But my favorite recording of this song is by, well you know, The Saints.

Label: Harvest – HAR 5166

Format: Vinyl, 7″, 45 RPM, Single Country: UK 1978


What do you do if they call you shrill because you demand your rights? You don’t get anxious about being unladylike. You realize that a man who fought for his rights would be considered appropriate and that ideas of what is ladylike have been used to control women for centuries. You translate shrill to assertive and smile smugly. Congratulate yourself that you have learned how to be assertive in your later years despite your socialization to be a “good girl” and cave in when confrontation arises, fearful of censure.

Jacobs, Ruth H. Be an Outrageous Older Woman, HarperCollins. Kindle Edition.