Madame Blavatsky

July 17/2026

Today I was at the shopping market. Outside near my car putting my groceries away I saw an older woman almost fall. She told me the bag was heavier than she thought. We talked for a while. Then a bee came up to me. The bee rested on my upper hand on top of my Hollyhock tattoo. On the light-yellow star center

The bee was at the center. Calm as I was. The older woman asked,

“Are you afraid that the bee will sting you.?

“I said no.”

“I have a thing with bees. They seem to like my nectar.”

I am glad we talked the three of us. The older lady, the bee and me.

Original Post

This morning, I went out to be with my cats and nature. A bee came up to me. Gentle from one ear and around to the next. This went on for some time. A type of buzzing communication. A bee blessing. I watched the bee fly away. To the lavender with the other bees.

I thought how intelligent bees are. More than we realize. How flowers, bees and nature and the sun coexist in a type of timeless harmony.

I asked the bees,

“Why can’t humanity live like this?”

A usually sudden manifestation or perception of the essential nature or meaning of something : an intuitive grasp of reality through something (as an event) usually simple and striking : an illuminating discovery, realization, or disclosure.

Throughout the ages and across diverse cultures, we engage with the rich tapestry of oral traditions and myths that define this season.

Every culture and religion possess narratives that convey significant meanings; the perpetual interplay of light, shadow, and darkness surrounds us, embodied by the sun, moon, and stars.

In the solemn cave, the fire of our ancestors communicates profound truths, marking this moment as an epiphany.

Last night I read some more from the book Madame Blavatsky: The Mother of Modern Spirituality, A Biography by Gary Lachman.

It was some thirty-two years ago when this woman opened my eyes to worlds I only dreamed of; as inkling, wanderings and pondering.

I have traveled and wandered through many spiritual journeys and coming back towards her, this Epiphany of 2014 (2016) (2023), (2025) makes me realize that in truth she has never left my curious side.

Gary Lachman’s book is not an easy book to follow. He walks with us through so many chums and characters that it is more of a reference book than a simple reading biography. Yet, it can be both enjoyable and a challenge.

True to the motif of my own religiosity, I find myself aligned directly to a quote from Lachman’s book,

The central message is that the dull, dead, mechanical universe which a triumphant modern science was applauding as the height of human consciousness, was, quite simply, false, and that the world was infinitely more mysterious, more fascinating, and more alive than what the Huxley, Tyndall, and others believed.

The ancients knew that and built a deeper, more profound science on that belief, a science that Blavatsky was here to revive.

2027 Almost 50 years since Flipside Was first Published.

New hardcover~ glossy inside and out, desirous inside and out, and delicious… it feels good. A part of a history that I feel is presented with sexy respect. The first handheld device of information. The fucking fanzine.

The most challenging times somehow make me highly creative. My list is complete for now with what I wanted to create this season. My Chapbook Dark City Punks and the Original Ten-Year Anniversary Issue 1977 to 1987 the hardcover.

To open the cork and celebrate that special Flipside Fanzine Issue. It looks great and I am incredibly happy with it. A dream complete of a hardcover copy. Within time I will make obsolete the Paperback edition. Even though that was a grand accomplishment on its own.

It was a process and like most things done by the Flipside Fanzine crew we learned as we grew. Seven years since it was published again. Thirty-nine years since its original publication.

2027 will be 50 years since the creation of Flipside Fanzine. So, this is an early move into that period of reality of how fast time goes by.

It was not my ambition to preserve Flipside Fanzine, but I have accomplished a lot for that strange little rag created to get into shows for free from Whittier California.

My gratitude goes to the original creators, my mentors, especially the master mind X-8. Yet this history is shared in the three narratives LOS ANGELES FLIPSIDE FANZINE THE NARRATIVE DOCUMENTARY / FILM. EPEISODION ONE, TWO AND THREE. For free viewing on my YouTube channel.

The Chapbook Dark City Punks shares a whole perspective of what I went through to get here. Sometimes a very lonely journey. I wanted to share the fermentation of punk inclusion and exclusion of punk intimacy.

Both for sale now and soon on my Amazon Authors Page.

https://www.amazon.com/author/hudleyflipside

Open Source

I was inspired today by watching the video below. The ideal of “CODE for the people.” Is a new concept for me but not an old one.

In this video so much of what I have always done and fought for was talked about. The growth of computers and the internet.

Years ago, I used Quantum Link with our Commadore computers at Los Angeles Flipside Fanzine. I had a group I met with called Midnite Mystics. We communicated across the USA.

My friends did not have a clue back then what I was doing. Yet it is a dinosaur to what we have now. My oldest son is an advanced computer engineer, and coding is a second language to him. Like my youngest son’s is math. Another language. Both beyond me but I do have my art. That is my source of communication between art and writing. My husband speaks so many other languages, but Chess is one that takes time to see and understand.

Symbols are my language and narratives. I was touched by this video, and it is some of the ideas shared that were like direct contact for me.

The fire of Promethius or Open Source as a way for the people to experience “the Freedom to be Free.”

I wrote about this in my new book Electric Honey and in the art of Attis.

I gathered this all together today to show us all that WordPress is a wonderous example of an open source to share our words, ideas, and art.

Fourteen years walking the WordPress & The Seminary of Praying Mantis Publishing!

Electric Honey

liberté être en liberté

Promethius’s song .

Pholus & Blessed thistle

First big Watercolor painting

size 44 1/2 by 22 1/2

Took some time a month or so..

An Interesting character Pholus …

And not only a centaur but a centaur-mantis.

“He was shy. He did not talk much. We three sat together.

Saturn said that Pholus was pleased with my painting of him. Then Pholus kindly spoke,

“I often sit in my garden like you and watch the praying mantis.”

He told me the name “mantis,” has great value and meaning to him.”

“Small acts can unleash far-reaching consequences,”

7/3/2026

I had an active imagination last night. I imagined a female voice announce that Saturn would like to see me. I had turned him down a couple of days ago. Had a tough week. Yet last night I agreed. So, the lovely white horse with wings was waiting- then zoom I saw the rings of Saturn.

“How fast,” I thought.

We landed and I gave the horse some barley and oats. I tickled his whiskers on his nose.

I walked up to the large open ballroom with rounded door. I was given a lovely white dress to wear. Feeling silly I asked if I could just be in my regular clothes.

“You mean your bitchin’ pants and t-shirt.”

I turned around and there was my beloved Saturn.

He escorted me to an upstairs room. He told me there was someone who wanted to see me. He introduced me to Pholus.

Pholus held out his hand and I said,

“Hello.” I touched his hand.

He was shy. He did not talk much. We three sat together.

Saturn said that Pholus was pleased with my painting of him. Then Pholus kindly spoke,

“I often sit in my garden like you and watch the praying mantis.”

He told me the name “mantis,” has great value and meaning to him.

Pholus told me gently that he has a healthy healing potion for my foot cut. So, Saturn was there to help him put a small, exceedingly small drop on my cut…

I fell asleep.

Later in the morning I remembered the experience and softly said,

“Saturn and Pholus I am sorry I fell asleep. But I assume Saturn brought me back as usual.

In reflection:

Pholus was in the shadows, soft spoken, gentle, and filled with a goodness that was a wonder for me to behold. He asked if I would finish the right of the painting with yellow. I hope I got that right.

Laura, you have one tragic weakness.

What’s a book, movie, or TV show that you wish you could experience again for the first time?

“Love is eternal. It has been the strongest motivation for human actions throughout history. Love is stronger than life. It reaches beyond the dark shadow of death.”

The film noir thriller Laura.

As many film noirs this one is always an amazing adventure.

Characters change, where good guys become bad guys, and bad guys become good guys.

Dana Andrews, Vincent Price and Gene Tierney were just a top selection of actors that I was beginning to know.

The first time! Every time!

Laura is always a deep wonder of shadows and delights.

The soundtrack pulls this whole film together.

I love a good detective film. Love and betrayal and overall, a deep side kick of audacity!

“Laura, you have one tragic weakness. With you, a lean strong body is the measure of a man. And you always get hurt.”

And exchange ideas through art.

What I love about this global WordPress community is that it feels real. Even as countries clash and leaders create division, it is comforting to know that people around the world can still connect, share this planet, and exchange ideas through art.

The artist Vincent van Gogh said this:

“Great things are done by a series of small things brought together.”

Fourteen years ago, I began this WordPress journey without knowing where it would lead.

Today I noticed a collection of WordPress achievements that made me pause.

Visitors from over 150 countries.

Readers from more than 50 countries. 

Fourteen years of publishing. 

Hundreds of posts.

A community that continues to read, follow, and encourages my work.

These aren’t awards in the traditional sense. They’re reminders that showing up matters.

I’ve never chased fame. I’ve simply tried to keep creating—painting, writing, publishing, and sharing what feels true.

Thank you to everyone who has stopped by, read an essay, looked at a painting, left a comment, or quietly visited from somewhere in the world. You are part of this story.

The journey continues.

— Hudley Flipside

The Seminary of Praying Mantis Publishing.

FLIPSIDE BENEFIT – MAY 8, 1981, at Vex Hall in Los Angeles

Punk Rock Colleague & Historian and Professional Consultant

Hudley Flipside

I want to apologize to the people who previously posted a flyer for this event. I denied it happened because I had completely forgotten about it. While searching through my old Flipside Fanzines for another show I thought I attended, I found this instead.

I was looking for a show Mike Patton posted today for The Starwood. An image of a Ticket February 3rd THE WEIRDOS, MIDDLE CLASS, AGENT ORANGE,

I know I was there but did not find the review in Flipside Fanzine. So many shows in an intense and brief time of our youthful rebellion. We are the seeds of a once blossoming culture.

Here is the review I found instead with images. It is an odd feeling to have a documentation of my youth. Things I have forgotten but cannot deny when they are right in front of me. No fake stuff here all authentic in 1980s time. From Issue 24 the Blue Jack TSOL issue. I was wearing my American Flag shirt I sewed up from a real flag but that is another story.

FLIPSIDE BENEFIT – MAY 8, 1981, at Vex Hall in Los Angeles

We’ll have to start off by thanking all the bands that played (or offered to play) and all the people that came to the show and put up with the heat and waited.

THE CROWD opened the show; to make a long story short, the band that was supposed to open SOCIETY’S VICTEMS couldn’t go on because they were supposed to use some of the GIRLSCOUTS’ equipment, and the GIRLSCOUTS didn’t show up (for whatever reason).

So instead of waiting,

The CROWD took the stage. Hud announced them as the Punk Beach Boys, which nobody likes (great joke), and they ran through their set. I was surprised at how well they played in the heat,

“We love summer, it’s like August here,” said Jim!

Despite the heat the audience danced, and the CROWD danced and it had to be one of the best sets I’ve ever seen the CROWD do, and they’ll tell you that.

After a long wait the band scraped up some equipment, SOCIETY’S VICTEMS

Steve from Flipside’s band, and Whittier’s one and only punk group came on. They did what they were supposed to do – 3 quick songs. They got quite a reaction, ranging from wild slamming to wild spitting, what can you say about a band’s first gig?

At about this time the Police made their first of three visits. They came in, did a quick head count, asked Joe about the capacity, and decided to close the doors to any more people – but the show could go on!!! Unfortunately, they chased away about 100 – 200 people that were still outside.

By now everyone was feeling the heat, and trips backstage or to the bar were common.

THE ADOLESCENTS faded into existence from sound check to actual set. I really don’t know when the set started – there were always people running around stage and Casey yelling for more drum monitor, anyways they played a frantic set. The heat didn’t stop anybody from going crazy, and the crowd seemed to eat up every song now that they know them by heart.

Mike Ness even got up to do the singing on ‘House of the Rising Sun’ – it was funny seeing him trying to wiggle like Tony.

CIRCLE JERKS were the last band to go on and did more than an adequate job of being the end to a great show. They played very intensely; the only time I’ve seen them better was at their own Birthday Party Gig, but tonight it was special because they debuted a bunch of new songs – so new Keith had to read them in the paper. And they are good ones too – songs about the RCP and such!!!

A great set, a great end. Lastly, we’d like to thank Joe for letting us have the show at his club, and all the bouncers who were really cool and had a great time celebrating Bam Bam’s (BIG bouncer) birthday.

A book found in the backside, in the corner near the peculiar man.

Allogash White Belgian Wheat

Long ago we took our kids to bookstores. Finding their favorite books was a big treat for us as well as for them. Today we had a good pint and meal and a walk. The local bookstore is still there where it has been for a long time now.

Bookstores have disappeared over the last few years. I am happy that Barnes & Noble is still moving along nicely and was filled with characters and other book lovers of all kinds.

I was on a mission to find one book by Alan Watts. And I searched all over and found none. Below and above this two-story store. I was focused on the Philosophy section. I did look elsewhere yet no luck. Then youngest son said,

“How about we try it again on the second level.”

The three of us went up the escalator but no dice. Husband was gone for a brief time.

Coming back to us He asked,

“What section are you looking for”?

“I am thinking Psychology but cannot find that section.”

He said,

“It is behind this shelf. See, what would mama do without me?”

The very top and the furthest away turned towards the window I found a short group of books in the Psychology section. Behind another section that had another topic.

There was a peculiar man sitting in a chair. There were only inches to walk by him.

He seemed introverted and looked down. I then said,

“Excuse me!”

Looking at books at the very bottom in the back corner.

“Oh, there is his book, the only book?”

To my surprise, the book bore Alan Watts’s name and was titled The Book. It was a small volume, and I’ve often found that my favorite books are the little ones. I then said kindly to the man,

“Thank you, I found my Alan Watts book.”

He looked at me and smiled and mumbled words I did not catch.

Unexpectedly on the way out I was inspired and found myself walking out with other books not so small. A lovely book about Alchemy & Mysticism including a few illustrations by William Blake!

A second book entitled Native American Legends Illustrated with an image of White Buffalo and a story.

Lastly, a Carl Jung Psychology Test in a box with a deck of cards.

I was enthusiastic to learn that Alan Watts held a master’s degree in theology and a Doctor of Divinity. It helped me understand why his work may be drawing me back to a path I stepped away from some years ago.

Thanks to husband who dropped the honey to look back, in the backside, and in the corner nearby the peculiar man.

I almost gave up. Finding a book on Amazon is easy but this was as mystical, peculiar and wonderful as Alan Watts seems to be.

White Buffalo Kachina at home

Honey in my Coffee.

“This is the real secret of life — to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play.”
― Alan Watts

A week before Easter and a week after I spent two weeks in Hospital. I almost died from a colon blockage. It has been a month since I have been out of hospital recovering.

Squirrel the Brave is here “our family garden.”

Tomorrow will be my last day of taking a time released steroid which I have slowly decreased as recommended by my gastrologist doctor.

I am still on a soft food diet.

I still feel like I am recovering since the steroid is like an elixir.

An immensely powerful drug to heal inflammation. I also started receiving infusion of a drug that will help my immune system to stop attacking my body. I was given plenty of antibiotics my first week. And a more powerful steroid the second week.

I am blessed with excellent healthcare from Kaiser. I am incredibly grateful but like anything else I also must be my own advocate. I pay attention and ask for things or ask for advice. I am that artist or perspective, or interval to disagree… if it is worth a new perspective or evaluation from a doctor.

So far, I have listened to my original hospital team and my gastrologist.

My potassium is stabilizing but my cholesterol is up and that very well could be due to the steroid. The powerful elixir steroid from the second week did make my blood pressure become truly angry and my heart felt like it would fly away.

Now my blood pressure is particularly good, and my heartbeat is comfortable again. As I start a normal diet and focus on healthy eating as usual, I hopefully will see that cholesterol go down.

Nacho Flower is here “our family garden.“

Due to a past unbelievably terrible experience with steroids from 2018 to 2019 I do have a type of traumatic experience when it comes to steroids. Some call it PTSD.

It is the beast I face and this time it was not different.

This time I had a wonderful experience with a nurse who touched my heart and made me release the healing that was going on in the process. At that moment I learned to use my years of Jungian perspective and alchemical processes which are to change the base metals into gold.

I did this by creating art, cleaning, and keeping a balanced perspective even though the beast pulled at my dark soul and amplified that strange unknown grief.

Now I am feeling in my belly the warm embers of a once unbearable raging fire.

I was shocked by my face with death. How close I was.

On this strange journey I found a gift, Alan Watts.

I guess I knew about him, but he arrived today with a random synchronicity. I have been called on this strange journey before. A vision quest.

As gentle as the softest elements of existence yet simultaneously imbued with a profound ability to uncover deeper truths.

I will take him as I do honey in my coffee. A little at a time. Maybe a book on my shelf for a while before reading. To feel that presence he so often writes about.

I pray for all who do not have the good health care I enjoy.

I advocate universal healthcare for everyone.

We are here, as I am here… we all deserve healthcare.

A fine singing bird is here “our family garden” where nature and humankind coexist.

“Know your rights.”

A few meows as the Title above says.

(Traslated)

– Saturday’s kitty cat Ice Cube social

Still causing trouble as I chew my gum….

funnies and gooey ooey, overflowing with delightful charm and a sense of whimsical joy, cherished experiences.

Monsters into asshole blokes…..

Bubblegum Flopside cOmics

ARTIFACTS — Hudley Flipside

An Excerpt of prose, poetry and insight from the chapbook Electric Honey by Hudley Flipside Read by Ganer.

Image by Shyane Cornell May 2026

– photographic telescope known as the A. Lawrence Lowell Telescope (or Pluto Discovery Telescope) at the Lowell Observatory (https://lowell.edu/discover/telescopes-exhibits/pluto-discovery-telescope/) in Flagstaff, Arizona

Pluto Love

Nietzsche Nacho Negotiator

“You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, the only way, it does not exist.”

~ Thus Spoke Zarathustra (1883-5)

ARTIFACTS — Hudley Flipside

Urania: The Divine Sister of Love and Power

Urania is often associated with Universal Love. Sometimes identified as the eldest of the divine sisters, Urania inherited Zeus’ majesty and power and the beauty and grace of her mother Mnemosyne.

Epsilon Carinae

March 21

Epsilon Carinae, also known as Avior, is a binary star system located approximately 610 light-years from Earth and is one of the brightest stars in the southern constellation of Carina.

I took a walk around the block and halfway down the street I looked at a tree on the left side of the street walk. A strange dark shadow. An unusual dark shadow in the heart of the tree. It was taller than I was and I was about two houses down from the tree. I stopped to notice the shape.

As the outside dimensions of the Virgin Mary. I have seen that shape many times before.

The darkness of it made me pause. Then as I slowly walked closer a house light came on. The light vanished from the dark shape. I looked over my shoulder, and it was gone.

The night had soft clouds, and the stars were not to be seen. Maybe creating the dark tree shadow. It was not my shadow.

As I reached home, I sat in the white plastic chair in my yard. I looked up to see one star. Thinking it was the “Dog Star” Sirius because it was due south set further back. It was Southeast. Higher in the horizon than the crescent moon that was present shining or glowing from the clouds in the sky.

I investigated on my Galaxy Apt that I have learned to trust as being fully accurate. To make sure it was the Dog Star. I was surprised to be corrected. It was a new star for me.

Avior a bright star in the southern constellation Carina. Known at the “Keel of a ship: also called by a Hebrew term as “the father is light.”

The shadow and the star were parallel so I will work on this.

Epsilon Carinae

A keel is the foundation longitudinal “backbone” of a ship or boat, running along the center of the bottom of the hull from bow to stern or front to end.

Carinae was once part of Argo Navis, the great ship of the mythical Jason and the Argonauts who searched for the Golden Fleece. (Greece)

Avior Night

Poem by Hudley / Franky

Light clouds close

The curtain

On the noisy sky

But one-star stays

Avior and a thin

Cresent breathing beside it.

Not everything

Just enough

A new friend

A Mysterious Feeling

Guidance doesn’t shout

It waits

Until the sky

Gets quiet enough

To see it.

Follow Me Lyrics

Camelot Lyrics

NIMUE:

(Lady Of the Lake)

Far from day, far from night,

Out of time, out of sight,

In between earth and sea,

We shall fly; follow me.

Dry the rain, warm the snow;

Where the winds never go

Follow me, follow me, follow me

To a cave by a sapphire shore

Where we’ll walk through an emerald door,

And for thousands of breathless evermore my life you shall be.

Only you, only I,

World farewell, world goodbye.

To our home ‘neath the sea

We shall fly; follow me.

Follow me, follow me, follow me.

An aging woman’s choice

Ok It seems as we get older it is good to have health care. Having health tests and check-ups is the way to see how things are going with the facts, figures, and statistics.

Yet we also are individuals. We are authentic living human beings.

A doctor needs to collaborate with the person, not just the average.

I was recently put on a statin to reduce my cholesterol. It was like having a noose tide around my neck. My blood pressure and cholesterol are normally higher for woman my age. Since it is a natural ageing progression.

So, I gave the drug a visit to my body.
I am grateful but realize there are other ways to be responsible for my health and my aging. So, here is my transformation.

I will let my doctor know how it goes and continue to be under observation. Yet as many women are losing their health care here are some delightful books that have helped me in the past.

My blood pressure and cholesterol were far worse after menopause than now. But it is nice the doctors get all excited to hand out their helpful pills.

I feel so much better off the statin. My throat and sternum have softened. My anxiety has left.

I realize sometimes drugs are needed and I respect this, but doctors know about women and their health and should be more upfront and inclusive on this part of our aging.
This is why I am sharing this today on International Women’s Day.

A few Books I had on my shelves that I am revisiting and working with again as I did in the past to help and support me now. And to help another gal along her journey.

A common issue for women aging.
Loss of estrogen will lead to high blood pressure and high cholesterol.

Reducing Inflammation, Enhancing Vitality, and Aging with Grace Anti-Inflammatory Diet for Women over 70 ~ Olivia Stokes
American Heart Ass. Cookbook
Healing Hypertension – Man
The HeartMath approach to managing Hypertension ~ Wilson Childre
Vegas Nerve Yoga Stimulation ~ Mary Dorn
Walking the Tiger Healing Trama~ Levine
Chakra Empowerment for Women – Erikson
Live Young Forever – Jack Lalanne
Abundantly Well: The Complementary Integrated Medicine Revolution
(Wise Woman Herbal Series) ~ Susan Weed (New Publication)
Listen to your favorite songs a lot.

Brushing off the truth and ignoring Justice!

Bananas!

Todd Blanche

Why I started my own publishing house, unique as my fingerprints.

Punk Rock Colleague & Historian and Professional Consultant

Hudley Flipside

“We become more characteristic of who we are simply by lasting into later years; the older we become, the more our true natures emerge.”

~ James Hillman

I was filled with a huge amount of energy today. So, I decided to clean my office bookshelves. Ya know how things sometimes get put on the shelves. Precious items that get dirty and block the books. So today I put the precious items in a box and will put them away for a while. So, I can access my books more efficiently.

Oh, some are missing like the few I gave to a gal to look over before an interview. I never did the interview last year due to being sick. I was so sick after the California fires. I am going to have to ask for them back soon.

Then I saw one book American Hardcore a Tribal History by Steven Blush. Glory glory Feral House Press. Why I started my own publishing house.

I remember being on Stig Stench Radio with Blush and Edward Colver. It was fun but they did the talking and complained about stuff. Ed stating in the past how his Photos were used without being responsibly sourced. And those images sold for profit. I told them both about how I saw my photo not sourced in the above book correctly. For an author and publisher, we make a lot of mistakes.

The Black Flag at The Church, Summer 1979 appears on page 49 of his book. I requested photo credit, noting that my name is listed as the photographer in the original Flipside Fanzine issue, which serves as the source material. They both brushed me off.

I took a lot of images in Flipside Fanzine. Al is a great punk photographer, but he did not take that one. It is included in our Los Angeles Flipside Fanzine Anniversary Issue a full-page image; ya I get full credit for that one a direct copy of the original image from Flipside Fanzine.

For Keith Morris’s 70th birthday I sent him a copy of the image along with others I took of him. Sweet and rebellious memories of when punk rock was just punk rock. I remember the term Hardcore when it became known and was coined. I still hate the term.

I really brought the image to the next level when I was asked for some images for the film 20^th Century Women. I could have given them a lot of my photos but instead just gave him this one. It is nicely framed in the film, and I get full credit in the ending credits to the sound of the Buzzcocks.

It was one of those moments while sitting with my two sons to see the film where I felt acknowledged for my dedication and love of punk rock. I thought to myself,

“I showed them.”

Furthermore, Blush and Edward Colver most likely don’t even know about my film endeavor for full credit, who knows, but Keith was aware of the image and got recognition with the original Black Flag.

The film’s creator grew up in the punk scene and gets both the issue and women’s perspectives. Well, done, Mike Mills!

“Character is as unique as your fingerprint and as we age, it can often surface in interesting and unusual ways and at unexpected moments.”

~ James Hillman

In the film 20th Century Women …women are at the table.

2016 Film 20TH CENTURY WOMEN

Sun Bear

Only the last few weeks a memory came forth. Days on the east coast living in Rochester New York. Taking the bus to see my patients as a Home Health Aide. Trained through the Red Cross.

There was a bus stop there where I would stop between buses. A coffee shop. It was small with a round platform. I would get a piece of pie and cup of coffee.

Here is where I met Betty MaCusic.

I was sitting alone and she sat next to me. Then she asked me a question,

“Are those Kachinas on your arm?”

They were two figures, tattoos, that do resemble Kachinas.

This is where a beautiful friendship grew over the years. Even until I moved back to California.

We talked about Native Americans, and the Medicine Wheel. A name came up that amazed her.

“Yes, I met Sun Bear. I went to a Medicine Wheel Gathering in the late 80s.”

I told her it was in northern California where I went for a week to a Medicine Wheel gathering. It was near the Russian River in Northern California. I was dropped off while the rest of the Flipside Crew went back to San Fransico for a show and distribution of our fanzine. Staying with Maximumrocknroll.

She told me her story. That her son and daughter-in-law were fans of Sun Bear. They did a recording for him of singing and drumming. They sent a tape to him. But they never got a reply. That saddened me. Later their marriage did not last and they divorced.

The probability of us meeting and talking about Sun Bear is a remarkable one. Now I realize that somehow, I was meant to assure them that the Medicine Wheel is real and part of our connection. I met her son but only briefly.

I don’t know where I found his original book published in the 1980s. But this is one that was published when I was in fact living in Rochester New York. Funny how I did not make this connection until recently.

It has been on my mind lately.

Sun Bear often said that “Shit Happens.”

He told me a story once where many people would call him and ask for help with their life problems. He would listen for a long time. Not sharing a word. Then he would break the conversation with these words,

“Go out into your garden. Dig a big deep hole. Throw some seeds into that deep hole. Then scream everything into the hole. Everything you just told me. Cover it up and see what grows.”

Then he would hang up.

It is amazing to think about how a book, place or person was found back in the middle of the 1980s. I guess following one’s intuition and going to the local bookstore was a way to find new things. I did a lot of correspondence back then. Writing, reading, and meeting people.

While I appreciate the ease of finding information today, I am surprised at my past experience of taking a bus to patients’ homes in Rochester and how I managed to find and attend appointments without even knowing the area. I was always on time.

Apple Cider & Betty

Medea

Part of the Strong Women Postcards Series

“Wise One,” eponymous Mother Goddess of the Medes. Like Medusa and Metis, she was named from the Sanskrit concept of medha,”female wisdom.” (1.) She was a fount of the feminine art of healing, and her name was related to “medicine.”

(2.) She could restore the dead to life in her magic cauldron, as shown by the myth of Aeson, who was so restored. Pliny called Medea a Goddess whose magic arts could control the sun, moon, and stars. (3.)

She rode in a chariot drawn by serpents; it also had wings, to show that she ruled both earth and heaven. (4.)

According to Herodotus, Medea was the Great Goddess of all the Aryan tribes of Parthia. (5.) She was all-wise, and never died, but dwelt forever in heaven. (6.)

She seems to have been remembered in Ireland as the Goddess Medana, associated with a sacred tree and a regenerative well, whose waters were reputed to cure sore eyes. She was artificially canonized as a saint, and her Christian legend was copied from that of the equally bogus St. Lucy? (7.)

The classic story of Medea’s ill-starred marriage to Jason apparently was based on a captured idol of the Goddess. Her rites were imported into Greece but proved too sanguinary for Hellenic taste. {Play by Euripides.}

The Woman’s Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets by Barara G. Walker. Pg. 628.

1. Larouse, 312. 2. Briffault 1, 486. 3. Hawkins, 139. 4. Graves, G.M. 2, 253.

5. Herodotus, 390. 6. Graves, G.M. 2, 252, 257. 7. Gifford, 131.

Larousse Encyclopedia of Mythology. London: Hamlyn Publishing Group
Briffault, Robert. The Mothers (3 Vols.) New York Macmillan, 1927
`Hawkins, Gerald S. Stonehenge Decoded. New York: Dell Publishing Co.
Graves, Robert. The White Goddess. New York: Vintage Books. 1958
Herodotus. The Histories (Henry Cary, trans) New York: Hawthorne
*Graves, Robert. The White Goddess. New York: Vintage Books. 1958
Gifford, Edward S. Jr. The Evil Eye. New York: Macmillan, 1958
Internet Archive: Digital Library of Free & Borrowable Texts, Movies, Music & Wayback Machine (Find some of the books above here for free viewing)
- * Could Also so be Grave, Robert: The Greek Myths (2 Vols) New York: Penguin Books Inc. or Graves, Robert, and Patai, Raphael. Hebrew Myths, New York: Doubleday & Co.1964.

Fanzines go Haywire….

Punk Rock Colleague & Historian and Professional Consultant

Hudley Flipside

March 1 2025

LA Zine Fest

I was forced to come to this event by a fanatical fanzine person and his friend. Trust Fanzine and Razorcake. Jan Rohlk and Daryl Gussin were table sitting for fanatical music fanzines.

While engaging Facebook, some friends’ posts brought up the world of Fanzines. Last year in LA I went to a fanzine event. It was fun to see individuals sharing their passions again without big media involved.

Yet in the mid-1980s it was a way for a scene to plug into a culture that was deep and a constant variable of uniqueness. No politically correct or nice. Yet I found things that were endearing to me.

We listed the fanzines we got every two months or so.

I am so proud of our once-underground culture still. I miss the strong current of communication all by way of the POBox.

Before the computer and I know if you were there you know what I am talking about.

For me it was a constant kaleidoscope of reading and typing and going to the POBox to pick up the mail.

Now I feel out of step with our current world. Always an intensity that is so alarming. I am glad I have my little oasis to keep me grounded.

Los Angeles Flipside Fanzine will always be moving around my psyche. Like riding my mustang on the hills of the Santa Monica Mountains or pushing my kids as young boys in the supermarket shopping cart.

Getting older is nice to reflect on deeds done and things created. Friends, family, and fans.

But as this song shares…. I feel out of step with the world too. As a young punk or an old one.

Three pages from Los Angles Flipside Fanzine # 38

These songs evoke memories of past debates among punks, highlighting their unique sacrifices and nonconformist identities.

It was my pleasure to see the conflict between bands. Their ideologies of freedom and sacrifice. About drink, drugs and tattoos and the stoic realities that left many of us punks to think for ourselves… ya that was a hell of a lot of fun for a nobody punk chick like me.