Honey in my Coffee.

“This is the real secret of life — to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play.”
― Alan Watts

A week before Easter and a week after I spent two weeks in Hospital. I almost died from a colon blockage. It has been a month since I have been out of hospital recovering.

Squirrel the Brave is here “our family garden.”

Tomorrow will be my last day of taking a time released steroid which I have slowly decreased as recommended by my gastrologist doctor.

I am still on a soft food diet.

I still feel like I am recovering since the steroid is like an elixir.

An immensely powerful drug to heal inflammation. I also started receiving infusion of a drug that will help my immune system to stop attacking my body. I was given plenty of antibiotics my first week. And a more powerful steroid the second week.

I am blessed with excellent healthcare from Kaiser. I am incredibly grateful but like anything else I also must be my own advocate. I pay attention and ask for things or ask for advice. I am that artist or perspective, or interval to disagree… if it is worth a new perspective or evaluation from a doctor.

So far, I have listened to my original hospital team and my gastrologist.

My potassium is stabilizing but my cholesterol is up and that very well could be due to the steroid. The powerful elixir steroid from the second week did make my blood pressure become truly angry and my heart felt like it would fly away.

Now my blood pressure is particularly good, and my heartbeat is comfortable again. As I start a normal diet and focus on healthy eating as usual, I hopefully will see that cholesterol go down.

Nacho Flower is here “our family garden.“

Due to a past unbelievably terrible experience with steroids from 2018 to 2019 I do have a type of traumatic experience when it comes to steroids. Some call it PTSD.

It is the beast I face and this time it was not different.

This time I had a wonderful experience with a nurse who touched my heart and made me release the healing that was going on in the process. At that moment I learned to use my years of Jungian perspective and alchemical processes which are to change the base metals into gold.

I did this by creating art, cleaning, and keeping a balanced perspective even though the beast pulled at my dark soul and amplified that strange unknown grief.

Now I am feeling in my belly the warm embers of a once unbearable raging fire.

I was shocked by my face with death. How close I was.

On this strange journey I found a gift, Alan Watts.

I guess I knew about him, but he arrived today with a random synchronicity. I have been called on this strange journey before. A vision quest.

As gentle as the softest elements of existence yet simultaneously imbued with a profound ability to uncover deeper truths.

I will take him as I do honey in my coffee. A little at a time. Maybe a book on my shelf for a while before reading. To feel that presence he so often writes about.

I pray for all who do not have the good health care I enjoy.

I advocate universal healthcare for everyone.

We are here, as I am here… we all deserve healthcare.

A fine singing bird is here “our family garden” where nature and humankind coexist.

Urania: The Divine Sister of Love and Power

Urania is often associated with Universal Love. Sometimes identified as the eldest of the divine sisters, Urania inherited Zeus’ majesty and power and the beauty and grace of her mother Mnemosyne.

Epsilon Carinae

March 21

Epsilon Carinae, also known as Avior, is a binary star system located approximately 610 light-years from Earth and is one of the brightest stars in the southern constellation of Carina.

I took a walk around the block and halfway down the street I looked at a tree on the left side of the street walk. A strange dark shadow. An unusual dark shadow in the heart of the tree. It was taller than I was and I was about two houses down from the tree. I stopped to notice the shape.

As the outside dimensions of the Virgin Mary. I have seen that shape many times before.

The darkness of it made me pause. Then as I slowly walked closer a house light came on. The light vanished from the dark shape. I looked over my shoulder, and it was gone.

The night had soft clouds, and the stars were not to be seen. Maybe creating the dark tree shadow. It was not my shadow.

As I reached home, I sat in the white plastic chair in my yard. I looked up to see one star. Thinking it was the “Dog Star” Sirius because it was due south set further back. It was Southeast. Higher in the horizon than the crescent moon that was present shining or glowing from the clouds in the sky.

I investigated on my Galaxy Apt that I have learned to trust as being fully accurate. To make sure it was the Dog Star. I was surprised to be corrected. It was a new star for me.

Avior a bright star in the southern constellation Carina. Known at the “Keel of a ship: also called by a Hebrew term as “the father is light.”

The shadow and the star were parallel so I will work on this.

Epsilon Carinae

A keel is the foundation longitudinal “backbone” of a ship or boat, running along the center of the bottom of the hull from bow to stern or front to end.

Carinae was once part of Argo Navis, the great ship of the mythical Jason and the Argonauts who searched for the Golden Fleece. (Greece)

Avior Night

Poem by Hudley / Franky

Light clouds close

The curtain

On the noisy sky

But one-star stays

Avior and a thin

Cresent breathing beside it.

Not everything

Just enough

A new friend

A Mysterious Feeling

Guidance doesn’t shout

It waits

Until the sky

Gets quiet enough

To see it.

Follow Me Lyrics

Camelot Lyrics

NIMUE:

(Lady Of the Lake)

Far from day, far from night,

Out of time, out of sight,

In between earth and sea,

We shall fly; follow me.

Dry the rain, warm the snow;

Where the winds never go

Follow me, follow me, follow me

To a cave by a sapphire shore

Where we’ll walk through an emerald door,

And for thousands of breathless evermore my life you shall be.

Only you, only I,

World farewell, world goodbye.

To our home ‘neath the sea

We shall fly; follow me.

Follow me, follow me, follow me.

“Cosmology is a literary Art…”or why I have flaming red hair.

Today is Blake Off day. In celebration of William Blake’s Birthday.

“Introverted intuition perceives all the background processes of consciousness with almost the same distinctness as extroverted sensation senses outer objects. For intuition, there for, the unconscious images attain to the dignity of things or objects.”

Pg. 23 Chapter Two The Supreme Introvert. Blake A psychological study by W.P. Witcutt

“Each day, the dawn unveils the mystery of this universe. Dawn is the ultimate surprise; it awakens us to the immense “thereness” of nature. The wonderful subtle of the universe aries to cloth everything. This captured in a phrase from William Blake “Colours are the wounds of light.” Colors bring out the depth of secret presence at the heart of nature.”

Pg 2., Anam Cara, A book of Celtic Wisdom. By John O’Donohue.

A poetry class at university ended quickly for me when a professor called William Blake a weird mystic, Christian. I promptly dropped the course signing up for an extra curriculum course where I studied a real mystic, Christian. Pseudo-Dionysius the Areopagite. This professor did not seem to grasp that William Blake is so much more.

A good “anam cara” guided me beyond words to concepts and images that I could understand despite dyslexia, showing me that language can be learned. Blake also played a part in helping me develop my soul.

How can one weave such a man as he into one’s life? How did he find my mind where his images and words resounded so strongly in my soul? As a lone reader and self-educated he was my deep reference and confidence. Finding him in those places where one goes wondering for answers. Which Blake amplified for me in so many unimaginable ways. I could read him and comprehend him so clearly. A wonder to me for sure.

Some books that stand out on my book shelves!

We were living in Santa Cruz, California. A magic book store named LOGOS is one we did visit often. Along with The Poet and Patriot Pub. Hosting a nice pint of something we called Grease Lightning. A half of Guinness and a half of Anchor Steam beer. We powered them down ready for some enjoyable reading later. Or husband’s endless games of chess.

Another book : Park South Books John Calmann and Cooper Ltd. 1977. William Vaughan (Backcover).

I discovered William Blake’s Divine Comedy Illustrations Dover Publications 2008. in a world where Dante Alighieri’s words and Blake’s images vividly came to life. At a Van Nuys California used bookstore.

The next book by Canadian Scholar a book entitled Fearful Symmetry A Study of William Blake by Northrop Frye, Princeton University 1947. I was introduced to this book by one of my professors at California State University Northridge.

“Holly, I think you should read this book. He reminds me of your focus on symbols and archetypes. He was a professor of mine years ago.”

Imagine that my professor identified something in me that I could not. And so, my private life with Blake entered the big world of “Blakean” experts filled me by analytical minds.

Then to finish off this “Blake Off” essay is a book I found later, was it Van Nuys, California or down a few blocks a rare bookstore off Ventura Blvd. in the San Fernando Valley, CA? Amazing little gem.

“For the story was preserved as a family tradition by the real descendants of John O’Neil and Ellen Blake (the Carter Blakes), who told it to the poet Yeats. So it was that our William, who should have been born and brought up in some crumbling tower by the Atlantic shore and fed upon the tales of the ancient Ulster heroes, instead was reared in Golden Square. But anyone who saw the little boy might have guessed that he was really Liam O’Neil, with “his flame-like golden-red hair on end standing up all over his head.”

Blake a psychological study by W.P. Witcutt. Page 8.

“Piping down the valleys wild

Piping songs of pleasant glee,

On a cloud I saw a child,

And he laughing said to me:

‘Pipe a song about a Lamb’…”

The “Song of Innocence,” ~ William Blake.

I thought we would be driving up to San Francisco to see some of William Blake’s art at The William Blake Gallery located at the John Windle Antiquarian Bookseller. My pilgrimage to see Blake’s work has taken a big reprieve. Time to rethink this again.

The mysterious distance….

Extraterrestrials and cats against fascists.

Stop ICE Warehouse Detention Centers:

Nat’l Day of Protest, April 25, 2026,

“The archetypical mind, which represents the personality of the galaxy.”
The Synchronicity Key, David Wilcock.

And so, the best stories are created by truths folded into everyday events. As cleaning the lowest shelves next to the wood floor in my office.

Move forward to advance with my war bonnet by retreating to clean the office.
Mikey the whizzer did his magic on my collection of David Wilcock books. Dust and cat piss is not my favorite thing to clean.

I don’t know if you saw it but Mikey’s band, the Whizzers, played on No Kings Day. Months of kitty focus and working with extraterrestrial sources.

And the protest continues against this wicked monster president and his asshole friends.

Cats know the doors, the thresholds that lead into other worlds, and uncover their way into the Oval Office. Mr. Wilcock tells these governmental stories about these doors.
So, the story is told to me by way of decoding cat’s meows and sounds.

By way of their kitty ESP and telepathic powers. My kitties were organizing to take a whiz on the president’s chair.

Mikey meowed so clearly at the live event. I recorded it but something weird happened? Our house lights were going on and off and our internet was out for the whole performance.

A day or two later Poobah the black kitty, was lying in my lap for her daily massage; I heard her purr that they did find the door into the Oval Office.

Yet they only found an old man with yellow hair sobbing.

He was throwing his food around and peed on his own chair.

This scared the cats, and they all came back home. Mikey felt betrayed by their kitty cat fears.

When he came into my office, he took a revenge whiz on all of David’s books. Kitties have found their purring peace since and now are back to cleaning each other’s ears.

Above David’s now cleaned books, and a glossy copy of a Flopside cOmic. “Punks In Space` Rockets A GO-GO.”

It fell down from a top shelf onto my lap. A closing synchronicity and conclusion to this curious feline story declaring,

“The door has been found!”

“The archetypal mind is intended to heighten this ability to express the Creator in patterns more like the fanned peacocks’ tail.”
-The Synchronicity Key, David Wilcock.

Punks In Space, Rockets a Go Go

Cimaruta and Rue

No truth so sublime but it may be seen to be trivial to-morrow in the light of new thoughts.— Ralph Waldo Emerson

My Rue plant.

Magic courts us and surprises us sometimes.

A place where it comes into your life.

When the time is ripe.

A past life comes a calling.’

When an old myth advances her head?

As it did for me

Materializing history and beauty

In my home

My oasis.

I was studying the idea or symbol of a key. I had a dream where Saturn gave me a key to study. It took me on a real-life journey of study. Books, myths, histories, and ChatGPT. All the older and modern tools of education, information, reflection, and human discernment.

Ancient design based on the Rue Plant.

Forming ideas and written words in my soul, mind, and feelings.

I came upon a charm with a key on it. It is called a Cimaruta.

I ordered a book and then the necklace. The day the book came I was out with the cats in my backyard. It was a moist morning with some intense clouds in the sky. I looked up over my home due west. I saw a perfect thunder bolt come down from the sky. It was amazing.

Then within a few hours the book arrived. While reading I looked outside and saw the strangest thing. Black kittens coming down from the back fence. Four black kittens and two black acting mothers. They have since adopted us.

Wild like the wind they are. Yet we do make love eyes.

I call them my Rues, standing at the Threshold.

“Beginnings are always delightful; the threshold is the place to pause.”

~ Goethe

The story of these black cats is years ago someone abandoned a mother cat and her babies. I have seen them roaming the neighborhood now and then. Yet we were not close, and they rarely came to my yard.

It seems as if now since I received this charm, it has become a part of their and my mythology, intertwining our stories in a way that feels both profound and magical. This charm carries with it whispers of ancient tales and forgotten secrets, reflecting not just my own experiences but also the shared narratives of those before me. I believe more than this too; it serves as a tangible connection to the past, a reminder of the bonds we forge through belief and the powerful symbols that shape our lives. Each time I touch it, I feel the weight of history and the possibility of new adventures, inspiring a deep sense of purpose that transcends the ordinary.

Receiving this Cimaruta—a potent Italian folk charm is a wonder to me. It is associated with protection, feminine power, and magic. To get it on the same day as the black feral cats indicates a notable synchronistic alignment. It appears that the forces invoked by the Cimaruta were making their presence known.

The key on a Cimaruta has been associated with unlocking mysteries, revealing truths, or opening portals to hidden knowledge, particularly knowledge related to lunar or feminine symbolism. It may also be interpreted as representing a threshold, suggesting that something in one’s life may need to be opened, entered, or addressed.

“I embrace the ancient crossroads,

Sacred throughout all time,

And the teachings there once told,

I claim and now make mine.

I hear the call of light,

That dissolves the dark of night,

Phantoms flee with harm’s intent,

From rays of light like arrows sent.

~ Page 43. The Cimaruta and Other Magical Charms from old Italy. By Raven Grimassi

Once while outside before they ran away. The two mothers and four kitties were there before me. The kittens four were formed into a perfect mandala. Weaved together with four faces looking up at me. The sweetest thing I ever saw. I will try to catch my mind’s image in a watercolor painting,

Slade, The Saints and Otis Redding

Punk Rock Colleague & Historian and Professional Consultant

Hudley Flipside

I wanted more light in the kitchen corner. To light up the roses as well. I had to move the refrigerator next to it to put in an extension cord. That is the dynamo effect of light. You put light on anything and so forth it wants to illuminate everything. I had to clean up behind the Frigidaire. Now all is cleaned up, and the roses got their illumination.

A song is like this too. It has an illumination or dynamo effect that kind of brings things together while cleaning things up. This song spoke to me today. A wonderful wise way or magnetic field of lyrics, singing song and instruments.

“Come on, with just a little bit of soul right now, baby
Lord, everything is gonna be alright
One more time, just one more time, baby
Don’t it, don’t it sound pretty good right now, sugar?
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah, baby
I need a little security right now, baby
Come on, come on.”

This kind of took me over today seeing how bands take a song being inspired to do it themselves is interesting to me. What is particularly interesting is the recording of Ottis Redding at the Whisky A GO GO. A global phenomenon of a song. And it is how I experience it. With the Saints coming to California this November this highlights my enthusiasm to see them. SO much mod podge sticking to my heart of experiences blended with punks, skins, mods and also the idea of Australia. Slade, The Saints and Otis Redding

A song can grab you and shake you. This song always has but now maybe a little bit more.

Otis Redding – Security Live at the Whisky A GO GO.

The song Security was written by Otis Redding and was first recorded and released by Otis Redding in 1964. It was covered by Lyres, Donnie Elbert, Chocolate Factory [DE], Mavis Staples and other artists.

Slade in their skinhead phase in 1969

Slade in their skinhead phase in 1969 and interesting read about their history briefly stated.

By 1966, this new version of the ‘N Betweens had recorded a promo single of the Otis Redding track “Security” and a self-penned song, “Evil Witchman”, released on Highland Records. A further single, “You Better Run” was released on Columbia Records and produced by Kim Fowley.”

The Saints

Prehistoric Sounds is the third album by the Australian punk rock group The Saints, released in 1978 via Harvest. This was the final album to feature founding lead guitarist, Ed Kuepper

Woman Watercolors

“Being put down and called a cow by some man when calling out those who are cruel and abusive. Even if it is in the usually subtle manner. I was told that meant double bitch.”

~ The world of being a woman, Hudley Flipside

Women were significantly affected during Trump’s first presidency. Conservative Supreme Court judges overturned Roe v. Wade, a decision that is not discussed often today, but I continue to address its implications. This action represented an assault on women’s autonomy over their reproductive choices, leading to widespread uncertainty across states and healthcare institutions. It also resulted in challenges for doctors and organizations like Planned Parenthood.

So, a woman in some cases must have her child even in rape and incest, and now the conservatives want to take away any help to these women who may lose their healthcare soon enough? The cruel irony of these soulless politicians, fascist religious blazers and dammed evil monsters are well documented and so unreal.

It was at a planned parenthood clinic in Santa Cruz California where I got my first Aides test, and a pregnancy test to find out I was pregnant with my first child in the 1990’s. The pay was based on a sliding scale. At the time it was extremely helpful. Even though I was working full time as a Home Health Aide with a Nursing Agency they did not have health care for their employees who were only hired per diem. Imagine that?

Which gets me to the point of my two shared images today. As a woman I have experienced being taken advantage of, due to my kindness, in my scene many times. A knife to my throat so to say. It is not easy overcoming being patronized and treated poorly as an experienced woman who is often devalued.

I got my voice in the original and growing punk rock scene. It was then that I encountered many other women with extraordinarily strong voices and some sang like angels.

American musician Annette Zilinskas is one of those women who is well known now in our music world. She is down to earth and very conscious. SO, when I get the feeling of inspiration I put it to watercolor.

“Change takes courage.”

~ Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

Then the female politician Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is another attractive woman who is also skin deep beautiful. She speaks of true liberty and equality for all and for a woman’s right to be heard especially.

They have that rare quality these days called audacity.

I will lasso this bold essay about bringing light to my art from my dark closet by saying,

“I am utterly amazed how well Tennessee Williams knows the female psyche. He honors her and addresses her unique qualities and so gives wings and light to her struggle.”

~ The world of being a woman, Hudley Flipside

“Brick Pollitt: What is the victory of a cat on a hot tin roof?

Margaret “Maggie” Pollitt: Just staying on it I guess, long as she can.”

~ Cat on a Hot Tin Roof is a 1955 American three-act play by Tennessee Williams.

Sunday funnies old Flopside cOmics…

Ezekiel Wheel Mr. Fuck “God is Every fucking man.”

“And the word of the lord came to me:
Mortal, prophesy and say: thus says the Lord; Say:
A sword, a sword is sharpened,
it is also polished;
It is sharpened for slaughter,
honed to flash like lightning!
How can we make merry?
You have despised the rod.”
~ EZEKIEL 21 8-10.

I never will forget when my oldest son and I read from the bible a certain part about Ezekiel’s Wheel. I often overlooked elements of war but in the bible our patriarchs are ruthless bastards. And so is Ezekiel’s Wheel.

A prelude to war. Fucking race gods fighting each other through their human pawns, a big cosmic game of chess.

This may seem esoteric because it is.
Recently Mr. Fuck and I were going through some of the Flopside cOmics and images, and we came upon a couple that he loved so much. We’ laughed aloud’ like we used to in time of grieving and wild exuberance.
There is more to this image, it was inspired by Human (Steve Pfauter) during one of our online conversations. We were talking about women singers of the 60s and 70s. And we moved into talking about the Goddess. I mentioned the quote “The Goddess is Every Woman” by a well-known Jungian therapist Jean Shinoda Bolen. He said that it was not fair and replied,

“The God is every man.” We enjoyed this back and forth and often later I would get a message stated,

“Hud, you know I’m just messing with you, having a little fun, nothing serious!”

Next watercolor is inspired by some of the guys from the Scotland Yard Pub in Canoga Park California. I was going through some grieving times of parents getting old and dying.

The punk rock nostalgia wave was just beginning to hit around 2007, and they still had DJs at the pub who played from their record collections, often prime 1980s punk. Some of the fellas influenced me in a pleasant way. But I did drink too much and began smoking for a brief time.

It was a relieving an offbeat microcosm of how the punk scene once was for me during my youthful rebellion.
To the songs and the great individuals and toxicologists at the pub. Thanks for helping me through some rough times. Mr. Fuck was often in the dark corner grinning asking for a lite after hours. Who knows maybe he is an offbeat shadow of my psyche.

If that isn’t bitchin’, I don’t know what is….

“My beloved is mine, and I am his: he feedeth among the lilies”

~ Song of Solomon 2:16.

I remember living in uptown Whittier California. Living in an art loft was fun right above a bookstore but what I enjoyed most was the little religious store. Here each morning a new quote from the bible was displayed. It was a ritual of mine to read that. This memory is what inspired me to display my art each day.

Incorporating the practice of displaying my artwork from my collection, which is carefully stored with my Jam Poster on the wall protecting my art, has become a significant routine in my daily life. It is enriching to dedicate time and attention to each piece. My collection includes both older works created many years ago and more recent pieces. I will continue to share these artworks each day.

It is like turning on the light or feeling bitchin’ which are goals of mine now at 67.

As a wife, mother, artist, and friend as one who loves nature and even man. To the rebels who do well in diversity. To love and hope when life is a place of melancholia.

TO Super Fuck …. A Flopside cOmic Character who is the extreme punker power, practicing a lifestyle of frugalism, inspired punker of wonder. Living in my backyard, the bomb shelter built in the 1960s.

Also, to the golden mantis who crescendos in August to lay her ootheca … to my personal Spear of Destiny moving forward from earth turning around the cosmos, around the solar system and the sun. Out from the planets into the dark matter of space and then come home resting upon a womb of a purple blossom in my garden.

Strong Women Poster T-Shirt

The times we are living in is a crazy time. A woman’s right to choose was our first blow, an alarming signal of the eroding freedoms we once took for granted, and now we face terrible violations of our rights that seem to multiply by the day.

Across the globe, women are rising up, reclaiming their voices in a world that tries to silence them. From the streets to the digital platforms, they demand equality, respect, and justice.

Each story shared fuels a collective fire, igniting change and inspiring hope, reminding us that we are not alone in this struggle.

Yet, amidst the chaos, there are still some women that whisper in my ear for justice, their strength echoes in my heart, serving as a reminder that resilience and courage can pave the way for a brighter tomorrow.

“And lend your voices only to songs of freedom
No longer lend your strength to that which you wish to be free from
Free your mind of mental slavery and you shall lead a life uncommon.”

For Sale at Tee Public … just click on image.

“Old Man Bar” punks

Whiskey Pete’s Hotel and Casino is a place that mom and dad always tried to get me to go to. Yet the years I endured Vegas as a kid made me repugnant to go.

Ya thin red roast beef with horseradish sauce, and Roquefort cheese dressing on our salads was a way to make us happy. But did not hide the truth from us kids, it never masked the drunk dad or overindulgence of his gambling. Alone in Hotel rooms waiting for mom to find dad. The next day endearingly covering him with newspapers to keep him from a sunburn as he naps near the pool. We kids became happily lost as we swam in the beautiful blue pools sipping on Coca-Cola.

I booked punk rock bowling in February. My first one. Then this nasty cold took me over. I keep waiting after two weeks for it to blow… but it is a nasty one. So, I had to cancel yesterday in order not to have to pay. I did and though I am part of the “Old Man Bar” punks… I will have to remember sweetly my punk days and watch from my safe place at home.

Here are a couple of funnies I did over the years, redundant, making fun of the punk scene… yes, I was willing to compromise and go to a really big show.

In truth my compromised perspective was not me… I would not have been happy at the punk rock Disneyland….

Making fun of punk bowlers “trophy whores” and bouncers or “Good Sherpas” … and all the stuff that is part of Big Punk Rock Las Vegas Style.

Fanzines that caught my eyeball, just call me the old bitch punk having some good times.

Or is it the old punk bitch ? I forgot how Jan said it ? Ha ha !

“… after you put this down, in the darker times, the deeper times, when you are looking up our of a hole that you feel like you’ve dug yourself into and can’t get our of, the connections that you’ve made from music, art, community and the people who have grown to become your family are all in there with you, because there will be lonely times, times of betrayal and doubt and unimagined anguish, but in twelve to twenty-four hours with the help of all the work that you’ve done the worst of it will have passed.”

~ “Three or Four Times a Month, Part III” By Daryl Gussin. The Forgotten Edge. May 2024 and September 2024. Booklet printed at Razorcake. darygussin.com

Naturally, many of us leaned against the wall while before us were fanzine people. It was crowded, and the vibe was filled with curiosity and wonder to find something to catch your eye. I call it synchronicity walking that what you find is meant for you.

I also achieved my goal of bartering my little bubblegum cartoon / fanzine with other fanzine people. A couple of things I put money forth. The pretentious attitude was not there, that is the best part and merging with mostly a younger generation who thought fanzines like this started with the Gen-X generation,

In line I said,

“It started a lot earlier than that.”

The young man smiled at me seeing my age and he received my high five with a loud slapping sound. Oh, I love doing that.

John and Jan and time for coffee

I was forced to come to this event by a fanatical fanzine person and his friend. Trust Fanzine and Razorcake. Jan Rohlk and Daryl Gussin were table sitting for fanatical music fanzines.

Sample fanzine one. Three or Four Times a Month, Part III” By Daryl Gussin. The Forgotten Edge. May 2024 and September 2024. Booklet printed at Razorcake. darygussin.com

After the free event outside the Broad my John and I walked around under the hotels, apartments hid within the Los Angeles City Hall and court buildings.

We ended up at The Redwood Bar & Grill. For a beer and a band. No band but to our surprise we again found Jan and Daryl doing something on stage. A performance of some sort? I punk rock charged them and then we went back to the bar for beer and some food.

Sample fanzines two IG:@mdzine89

The bar was easy and exceptionally low key. Next to us was a man giving toasts and told us about a certain word in Spanish.

“Do you know what SOCKS means in Spanish?”

“Tell us.” We all said.

Socks like ‘eso sí que es’ in Spanish which means ‘that’s the way it is.”

We enjoyed this and glad I remembered it here.

Sample fanzine three

This gentle man turned out to be a retired firefighter. We talked about the latest fires in Los Angeles. I was amazed by how he defined why the current fires happened. It was parallel to my campaign and his expertise. My “Mandatory Stop building in the San Fernando Valley,’’ is so right on and yes, he agreed with it and told me to keep up the decent work.

He knows that fires are part of an effect of bad or corrupted city and county planning. He affirmed,

“Who do you think is giving out these permits?!”

They are all taking money as they talk… in their back pockets. We have agreed that building big apartments right on the freeway and building big homes and massive apartments in fire prone areas is a sin.

This gentleman affirms my theory with experience and firsthand knowledge.

Sample fanzines four Rimona Eskayo Artist . workers

Driving the freeway from the San Fernando Valley to downtown Los Angeles is not one of my favorite things to do, we had no choice.

I am very happy we followed the night through realizing something. Always keep that meeting with a real friend! Who is more of a music fanatic than you! It is well worth it.

Jan and Hud

https://www.lazinefest.com

My campaign needs your support…

Big ugly monsters are taking over the San Fernando Valley.

A mug is a mug…

The Seminary of Praying Mantis Publishing.

Click on link below to get your stylish mug … or other merchandise by yours truly ❤️

https://www.teepublic.com/user/the-semianry-of-praying-mantis-publishing

Compassion, unfathomable galaxy

I do not often show my religiosity training. Be it from university or experience or the blending of the two.

In the 1980s I had a long correspondence with the Poor Clares of Long Island New York, who led me from the Anglican Church to the Episcopal Church. Yet in my heart I was hearing a call from the Franciscans who are members of a Catholic religious order.

I explored the concept of Episcopal women serving as Priests after reading “Womanpriest: A Personal Odyssey” by Alla Renee Bozarth.

I liked them all in their essences of spirituality and integrity of faith, believing in something beyond themselves. Yet it is always the dogma of the church that makes me wonder off.

Professor Hap at university was an Episcopal Gay Priest who would talk about synchronicity and Fellini’s Satyricon with an odd look on his face. We both knew, recited and prayed the Rosary.

Yet my esoteric past held me at a place that could not be bound by dogmas.

“So nigh is grandeur to our dusk,

So near is God to Man!”

~ Ralf Waldo Emerson

“Though the individual fact there ever shone for him the effulgence of the Universal reason. The great Cosmic Intellect terminates and houses itself in mortal men and passing hour. Each of us is an angle of its eternal vision, and the only way to be true to our Maker is to be loyal to ourselves.

“O rich and various man!”

he cries,

“though place of sight and sound, carrying in the senses the morning and the night and the unfathomable galaxy; in thy brain the geometry of the city of God; in thy heart the bower of love and the realms of right and wrong.”

Pg. 1121, Address at The Emerson Centenary. William James.

Mariann Budde A new postcard part of the Brave and Strong Women Postcard series.

“In thy heart the bower of love and the realms of right and wrong,” and this is what she calls to all of us, it is the ability to discern the willingness of compassion or the lack there of. I think so.

We need more of “the effulgence of the Universal reason.” Effulgence means radiant splendor or brilliance. It can also refer to the state of looking exceptionally beautiful or being full of goodness!

Compassion is the “splendor of brilliance.”

The beauty of a flower resembles Mariann Budde, who embodies the connection between “the great Cosmic Intellect and mortal [woman].”

As Mariann Budde said,

“But the vast majority of immigrants are not criminals. They pay taxes and are good neighbors. They are faithful members of our churches and mosques, synagogues, gurudwaras and temples. I ask you to have mercy, Mr. President, on those in our communities whose children fear that their parents will be taken away. And that you help those who are fleeing war zones and persecution in their own lands to find compassion and welcome here.”

In the late 1980s I read “Womanpriest: A Personal Odyssey by Alla Renee Bozarth.” Alla talks about her triumphal cry and about her courage… she had to go on in life after great loss. A lovely biography and what was special is how she said she danced to this song barefoot… it was her song of liberation… let’s hope for the liberation of all who are struggling right now around the world… and hope for the good hearts of our leaders to grow stronger with compassion and mercy in the dim times that we now face.

Sabrina Cowgirl Extraordinaire

January 29, 2025 “Sabrina Cowgirl Extraordinaire,” is published.

The seasons were four and very dependable. Each had a call from a bird or native animal that roamed the land. Cowboys carried their gear selfishly and often were more interested in moving on than causing any trouble. No one noticed the small, framed cowgirl that often bossed the guys around.

Click on Image to view and purchase.

Originally posted on Amazon’s Kindle Vella, this story is now shared here to preserve its essence and to invite readers into a world where the past intertwines with the present. Nature remembers our history and ancestors, whispering their tales through the rustling leaves and flowing rivers, and sometimes, we are gifted with stories that deserve to be remembered and treasured for generations.

In the summer of 2021, a story took shape as I gazed over the late summer pool, the sunlight glinting off its surface, and was inspired by visions of three characters: Sabrina, an adventurous spirit with a heart full of wild love; Colin, a rugged soul bound to the land, wrestling with his past; and Hawk, a storyteller who weaves their lives together with his words.

This tale, born from the wind, captures life beyond the present—a romance amidst changing customs in the deep-rooted wild west, a place where love, loyalty, and the relentless passage of time challenge the very essence of who we are.

The captivating realm of Novella storytelling, rich with emotion and steeped in myth, beckons us to explore its depths and uncover its profound beauty.

Potnia Theron.

Lady of the Animals

I Saw you once.

In my dreams.

Before I knew your name.

I was at a Golf Course Green

Near where I grew up.

I played there as a child.

I saw your head emerging.

From the sand trap on the green.

Ascending up

As made by some

Prehistoric substance.

Colors of the sand, earth, and primordial statues

Of antiquity.

You looked at me.

Turned and then.

As a fast wind

Ran up Canoga Ave

Up towards Mulholland

And the youthful

Santa Monica Mountains.

With you were many wild animals.

Lions, bears, horses, raccoons, tigers

Skunks, opossums, and elephants.

All the wild animals and you

Ran so amazingly fast away towards

The mountains.

I now finally know your name…

Potnia Theron.

“Lady of the wild things.”

Artemis…

Ancient a time long ago 600 BC.

I call upon you for your wisdom.

I love your wild things.

I want to run with you.

I also call upon your protection.

From those who

Condemn the wild animals.

And my love for them

And you.

Be with us.

The wild things and me.

I ask for a swift

And vigorous justice

TO be heard, seen

As innocent.

Oh, my Powerful…

Potnia Theron

Creating a way to organize all of the publications we received and reviewed.

Punk Rock Colleague & Historian and Professional Consultant

Hudley Flipside

Mikey Puss….

The redundant statement of looking for something and finding something else. Years ago, in 1987 I did do a fanzine convention. Well, it was more like garage sale and only a few people showed up. I guess having foresight and enthusiasm as a fanzine publisher was a bit ahead of my time. Yet we did receive a lot of creative endeavors of the left-handed and right-handed kinds.

As you see it got to be a by mail revolution of people to communicate with each other. It was warping around me and through me until at the end of 1989, I did have a few of my eight octopus appendages fall off… burn out.

Yet again here is a bit of that history… I did work my tail end off … yet here I am typing about them again.

“Like the bearded asshole said.”

I am a midget now at 5’ 3” … but hey I was alone doing this stuff… where were you?

Let’s respect it for what it was. It was a counterculture revolution… it lived a good life. It is fun to bend backwards and remember. My punk rock curse.

Creating a way to organize all of the publications we received and reviewed.

Nature is not lost.

The Divine Comedy Inferno
Canto X111
1-4

“Nessus had not yet reached the other bank
When we began to make our way across
A wood on which no path had left its mark.
No green leaves in that forest, only black;
No branches straight and smooth, but knotted, gnarls;No fruits were there, but briers baring poison.”

My responding…

Nature is not lost
All wild creatures, insects, plants, and trees are in a state of ecstasy. The praying mantis reflects in my watery psyche only a drip of what that is.
As she embraces the gardenia plant!
Climbing through and reaching also the trailing purple tubular magenta flowers.
Touching the earth while reaching towards the sun.
A spell, my enchanting bliss.
Cleaning away the contrast
Of contraries of my human experience of a paradise lost!

The Divine Comedy Paradiso
Canto XXV
124-127

“Only those two lights that ascended wear
Their double garment in this blessed cloister
And carry this report back to your world.
”When he began to speak, the flaming circle
Had stopped its dance; so took its song had ceased-
That gentle mingling of their threefold breath-”

Earthquakes & songs. No don’t stop the rain here in California.

Punk Rock Colleague & Historian and Professional Consultant

Hudley Flipside

“Fogerty claims the song is about “the apocalypse that was going to be visited upon us”. He also said that when the band was learning the song he recognized the contrast between the apocalyptic words and the happy melody. He said, “It wasn’t until the band was learning the song that I realized the dichotomy.”

“Bad Moon Rising” is a song written by John Fogerty and performed by Creedence Clearwater Revival. It was the lead single from their album Green River and was released on April 16, 1969.”

I can see that there are many artists that have done this song… some really stupid like Satin Puppets and Nxghtshade, old news… ick so redundant.

Yet the best is the original by CCR…

5 days until a full moon as the harbinger of the autumnal equinox approaches. Fires, earthquakes, and lightning… yes. It feels extreme. Glad the heat wave in California broke… yet we did have an earthquake today here in Malibu California.

Fires are happening too. It does not make one want to shout for joy…

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