People, oh geez. The pressure to do things with people is way too scary and stressful for me. PTA, gigs and the supermarket. I prefer to do things without people in the privacy of my world. I just saw the film A Fantastic Fear Of Everything. I knew the character of the film, me. Well maybe not as extreme, but mightily close. Also last weekend I went to a local art walk. I was embarrassed for the artists showing their art. I told my son,
“I could never do that. Sit around all day while other people judge my art. I would rather die!!”
“Mom it could be fun sitting around in the shade and relaxing. Don’t take it so personally!!”
I think the internet is the most remarkable place for little creeps like myself. I can project, ramble and spell correctly. I can control it all. Stranger or friend out there BEWARE!!
I see life growing around me, changing and there are so many new stories to tell… but with procrastination comes a hallow, a shadow of watching and waiting for you to move forward to the honey!!
Today one of my kid’s longtime friends, Sebastian-across the street, came over to say hello. They have been friends since the 4th grade. We had not visited with him for a couple of years. The first thing he asked me was,
“Have you published your book?”
“No… not yet… ah.”
“Oh you haven’t found a publisher yet?”
I remember that he was always curious about what I was doing on my little laptop computer about 6 to 8 years ago. I then excused myself to take the groceries in. Darn kids are great and when they become young men they are clear, strong and to the point. I have been procrastinating. I finished the book years ago. It has a good solid foundation but needs a lot of editing and embellishment. Since then many books have been published on this particular subject of mine.
Kindling, wood and log support can help chase away evil procrastination…
Boredom, disillusionment and losing both my parents put a real damper on my need to promote it or even work on it. I also had a couple friends turn into Dementors and almost suck my very identity from me. The face of trust eludes me these days, but Sebastian has given me the extra acknowledgment, reflective push and ambush to rekindle the fire in my will to move forward again. Kindling, wood and log support can help chase away evil procrastination.
“Lord, there goes a Buick forty-nine Black sheep of the angels riding, riding down the line We think there is a soul, we don’t know That soul is hard to find.”
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